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Dax Montana

Hunting for the Finer Things of Life

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Saturday, September 06, 2003

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Go Dawgs!

Bulldogs win, Auburn loses, and Tennessee barely beats Marshall. Wow! did I
miss a lot while shooting guns. Just Damn!

posted by Dax Montana 10:06:46 PM

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Dove Season

Ahhhh, the open fields, the panting retrievers, sunrise and a cooler full
of beer, today was opening day of dove season. My shoulder does indeed hurt like
hell and I'm sure to have a huge black and blue bruise in the morning. I haven't
shot my shotgun in a little more than a year. I didn't put many doves in the
freezer, but the ones that are there will be very tasty. 

There was a time when I never missed an opening day.  I'm afraid that
dove hunting my be headed for extinction here in Georgia. The amount of fields
keep shrinking every year. People just don't want to face the liability of an
injury or accident on their property. Furthermore, bird hunting is on a decline
in general. 

posted by Dax Montana 9:57:28 PM

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Water With Attitude

I heard an advertisement on the radio today. The product is called Nicowater.
This stuff is nicotine enhanced water for those times you can't light up. Imagine, your on a long flight and can't light up a smoke.
No problem, just have a swig of Nicowater and your cravings disappear.

Some time ago, I was walking the grocery store aisles. The one product that caught
my attention was Caffeinated water. I thought about what I would use Caffeinated
water for. Of course, I would brew a pot of coffee with the stuff. It would have
an extra kick in the ass without tasting bitter. I also thought about making
Kool-Aid for the kids. My kids bounce off the walls enough as it is...I quickly
dismissed the idea. I still smile at the thought though.

Now that this new nicotine water is out on the market. I can combine the
Nicotine water and the Caffeinated water for a really special cup a Joe. My
mornings would never be the same. I'm going to price this stuff and experiment
with it. My first question is, does it taste like water or like an ashtray? I
wouldn't want to drink a damned ashtray. Another question I have is, how much
water is equivalent to a cigarette? I don't drink water. I drink coffee and
booze. I don't want to drink a gallon of water just to save a smoke.

I'm sticking with the mixed water coffee idea. I'll call it something like
Just Damn! Coffee!

posted by Dax Montana 9:42:45 PM

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Karaoke Still Sucks

I know I've mentioned, in passing, just how bad karaoke sucks. Well, here I am again, on karaoke night, trying to escape the madness of drunks singing their little hearts out. God, please let tonight end quickly. Just Damn!

posted by Dax Montana 10:05:39 PM

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The Roach Coach

Today is the Big day for the roach coach. The boss and one of our Mexican cooks are making the inaugural drive this morning. I think they are going to sell the tacos, tamales, and burritos to the mass of immigrant construction crews that permeate the north metro area.

The roach coach is a reconfigured catering truck. We cater events about once or twice a month. In order to defray some of the truck expense, more expense was put into the reconfiguration and stocking of the truck. I wish them luck and pray that the idea loses luster before it’s my turn to drive the damned thing.

Oh, did I mention that the horn plays la cucaracha? Just Damn!


posted by Dax Montana 5:52:25 AM

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Gone Huntin’

Acidman is bustin’ my chops because YACCS is down for a week and I won’t have comments. Yet another reason to move off the free stuff. He misunderstood my Athens trip last night. He thinks I didn’t have a good time. Well, he is sadly mistaken. I had a blast. I had Jager Bombs and Red-headed Sluts all night long.

Deer season is quickly approaching. I hunt near Athens. Maybe I should invite Gut Man up for a hunt. It’s not like I don’t have Vacation time coming. We could hunt a day or two then drink at my pal’s bar for a day or two. Just Damn! Why not?

Here’s a map A-man. Can you find the place?




posted by Dax Montana 4:12:40 AM

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My Horoscope

Davezilla cranks out another classic. Somehow, his astrology is dead on balls. Maybe Jeanne Dixion should ask for his assistance. Here's my Horoscope:

Leo: What can be said about you, that you haven’t already bored us with before? Spend another day dominating conversations and making enemies merely by existing.

Just Damn!


posted by Dax Montana 3:03:34 AM

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Closure.

Well, I made it back from Athens. I had a good time. Somehow, I sense that it just wasn’t right for me to be in Athens. After being there for the night, I realized that my time hasn’t come yet. I guess the trip gave me a little closure on the situation. Damn, I’m glad that’s over with. Now I can move on.


posted by Dax Montana 6:28:57 AM

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Atlanta Falcon Blog

I just found an Atlanta Falcon Blog. I normally wouldn’t care but when I read this…

“’I think a team is a reflection of its coach,” said a visibly upset Reeves. "I pride myself on being a coach that has a team that won't beat itself. We definitely weren't that kind of team tonight. We've been that way the whole preseason." - Dan Reeves after the Cleveland game.

Thank you. Please retire now.

Either that or lets run it up the middle 50 more times. Do you think you might want to try a different play?

Did you see that first play Cleveland ran? That's called CREATIVITY. Look it up, Dan.”

It made my Blogroll. Just Damn!


posted by Dax Montana 7:06:39 PM

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Drink of the Day

I haven’t posted a drink of the day lately. I just haven’t had anything new in a while. I find a drink I like and stick with it for a while. Anyway, if I’m headed for Athens and the Uptown Lounge, it seems that Jager Bombs are on the list. They are kind of like a Boilermaker, sideways sort of.

Ok kiddies, Whip out your tall rocks glass and fill with Red Bull, the energy drink. Whip out your shot glass and fill with ice cold Jagermeister. On the count of three…two…one…Drop the shot into the glass and chug away. Bombs away! It's a poor man's speedball. Just Damn!


posted by Dax Montana 6:44:21 PM

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No Comment

The server at yaccs is down so I still have no comments. I like comments. I don’t always respond to them. I’m bad about stuff like that. I don’t reply to a lot of email either. I hate to return phone calls too. I guess if you catch me you got me. Just Damn!


posted by Dax Montana 6:27:58 PM

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Gotta Do It

Sometimes a man’s gotta do what a man’s gotta do. I reluctantly plan to travel to Athens tonight to check out my buddy’s bar. You know, the one I was almost part owner of. Anyway, this Saturday, he has to be in a wedding. He asked me to watch over the place because it is after all the first Georgia Bulldog home game. I scheduled off work for that day, however, I can’t watch over a business I’ve never been in, hence, tonight’s trip.

I have mixed feelings and have put off this trip for the last two weeks. Tonight is my last night off before Saturday. I have to go. Maybe the lost opportunity is what is fueling my disgust of my present job. Anyway, I’m taking my Big Red Cup. (What stealthy managers keep their beverages in.) I’m cashing in my free bar tab. Just Damn!


posted by Dax Montana 6:24:32 PM

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The Art of the Sandwich

I like sandwiches. A lot! The greatest thing since sliced bread is stuff between sliced bread. Peanut butter is a classic. Ham and Cheese is a personal favorite. I can’t forget the BBQ sandwich either.

I like grilled cheese sandwiches too. I only eat them at Waffle House. I just can’t make them at home. It’s not because I don’t know how. It’s because I can’t seem to keep them grilled cheese. I always find some mustard, or ham, or mayonnaise or something else. If it’s more than American cheese between two slices of white bread. It’s not a grilled cheese sandwich. Although, a few dill pickle slices are allowed, on the side of course.

I like sub sandwiches. I like them because they are Big and loaded with good stuff. I like the oil and vinegar dressing with my sub. I used to work for Blimpie. I ate sub sandwiches everyday for seven years. Psst…. Just to let you in on a secret…. that Jared guy on the subway commercials…. Full of shit.

I tend to be more of a meat and bread sandwich guy. I don’t like lettuce and tomato on my sandwich. (Subs excluded) White bread, wheat bread, I don’t care. Rye bread is good too. I like mayonnaise and mustard. The cheese goes on the mustard side. Always. If the bread is slightly stale or kept in the fridge, I like mayonnaise on both sides of the bread.

The condiments for a sandwich depend on the sandwich in question. Mustard only for a Corned Beef on Rye or Pastrami. Mayonnaise and mustard for a Ham, or Club sandwich. Mayonnaise only for a leftover turkey sandwich or a homegrown tomato sandwich. (Salt and pepper on those too)

I mentioned peanut butter before. Now, allow me to expand. Peanut butter only is great. I like it when it sticks to the roof of my mouth. Add jelly, man what a treat it is. A little trivia for you, did you know that 95 percent of all jelly sold is either grape or strawberry? Sometimes I feel like Welch’s grape jelly, and other times I feel like Smucker’s strawberry preserves. I like the big chunks of strawberry. Speaking of chunks, I like smooth or creamy peanut butter better than chunky peanut butter. I’ll eat them both without complaint. I have to be a little strange sometimes and eat apple or raspberry jelly with my peanut butter. And to be really different, I like orange marmalade too. I’ve never had a peanut butter and mint jelly sandwich, but I have eaten a mint jelly and lamb chop sandwich. Man it was good too.

Before leaving the peanut butter behind, I must mention peanut butter and honey. Oh my god, what a great combination. I like to swirl the honey into the peanut butter as it coats the bread. I like peanut butter and bananas too. Back in my longhaired hippie dope smoking days, peanut butter, honey and bananas was simply awesome. As a matter of fact, I wrote a “stoner’s cookbook” once. It included the peanut butter banana honey sandwich.

Although I don’t eat them too often, one of my favorite sandwiches is the B.L.T. Man what stoner thought that combination up? “Dude, lets get some fried pork guts, some fricken tomatos and crispy lettuce, then put whipped up eggs and oil on bread and make a sandwich.” That gut was certainly thinking outside the box on that one. It makes one hell of a sandwich though.

When I go out to eat a steak, I always allow some of the meat to find its way into the bread steakhouses serve. I like to sop up the “juice” with it. Chicken fingers always go between the Texas toast.

Even though I make great sandwiches, my mom and my wife are the best sandwich makers. They may not put the cheese on the mustard side, or enough salt on the tomato sandwich. I’ve tried for years to figure out what they do differently. I finally figured it out. They add a little love. Now that’s a great sandwich. Just Damn!


posted by Dax Montana 4:41:34 AM

Tired

I’m so tired. Not that sleepy tired where you can’t keep your eyes open, but that mental tired, where you can’t keep your brain open. I’m really tired of work and the last couple of posts reflect that. I think it’s time for a vacation. I have 12 days of vacation coming. I don’t want to just have days off. I don’t want to waste the vacation. I want to do or go somewhere with my family. I thought about saving my time for deer season. However, I can’t take my little kids with me and my wife isn’t into it. Being a young family unit, we don’t have the Disney World kind of money yet.

I’m getting really burned out on the job. Day in and day out, it’s the same old thing. Punk ass kids always wanting their spoiled ass way. Never mind the goal of operating a business at a profit. Anyway, I’ll work through it. I always do. Just Damn!


posted by Dax Montana 5:05:38 PM

Babysitting

As perhaps the only truly responsible adult employed at my job, I have determined that I
am really just a glorified babysitter. I get to stop the children from fighting, I make sure
they share their toys, and I see to it that they clean their rooms. Really!

These people fight and bicker amongst themselves. My kids don’t fight and argue as much
as these employees. They fight over tables and cleaning assignments too. I try to make our
job pleasant for everyone. I don’t want to be there anymore than any of the rest, however,
it’s our jobs. Of course, when I try to keep it light and fun, some asshat employee has to
squeal to mommy and daddy. Now, I have to be a hardass. I hate when that happens. Just
Damn!

posted by Dax Montana 9:58:50 AM