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Dax Montana

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Thursday, August 08, 2002

I’ve taken a few days off from Blogging. I felt that I really didn’t have anything to contribute. I was just going to let my Blog slide into oblivion. Cast aside and forgotten like an old rusted car covered in the kudzu. I don’t know if I’m read daily or not. I don’t really care. I do watch the hit counters and comment boxes though. I like to read other’s Blogs. I like to keep up with their daily lives, important events, and the ever-popular news commentaries. However, I find myself censoring myself because I don’t want to cause strife at work. I don’t want to reveal too much of my personal life because of Family issues. Sitting here thinking about what to say next like some old man on the mountain waiting to impart the perfect bit of wisdom. Sure I write for me, but I also write for you. Maybe spark a debate, maybe enlighten, maybe I just want to speak now or forever hold my peace….

I got an email from my Ex. She is the mother of my eldest child. She wrote to inform me of her up coming marriage. I think I’m happy for her. She also said she is moving to Michigan. Again, I think I’m happy for her. I also found out she has read this Blog. I am overwhelmed by guilt for the neglect I’ve shown my son. Nicholas is such a wonderful boy. I am 6 months behind in my child support. I haven’t spoken to him in as many months. I haven’t seen him in a year and a half. Frankly I have been a bad father to him. Actually I haven’t been a father to him at all. I intended to make him a part of my life but circumstances seemed to prevent that. The road to hell is surely paved with good intentions. Now that his mother knows where to find me, I write to an audience of one.




posted by Dax Montana 5:25:28 AM