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DEAR BOSS (BRICKS)

Dear Boss I write this note to you to tell you of my plight
And at the time of writing I am not a pretty sight
My body is all black and blue, and my face a deathly gray
And I hope you'll understand why Paddy's not at work today

I was working on the fourteenth floor, some bricks I had to clear
And throwing them down from such a height was not a good idea
The foreman wasn't very pleased, he being an awful sod
He said I'd have to take them down the ladder in my hod

Now shifting all those bricks by hand it seemed so awful slow
So I hoisted up a barrel and secured a rope below
But in my haste to do the job I was too blind to see
That a barrel full of building bricks was heavier than me

Now when I came down I cut the rope and the barrel fell like lead
And clinging tightly to the rope I started up instead
I shot up like a rocket and to my dismay I found
That halfways up I met the bloody barrel coming down

Well the barrel broke my shoulder as to the ground it sped
And when I reached the top I struck the pulley with me head
I still hung on though numbed and shocked from this almighty blow
And the barrel spilled out half the bricks, fourteen floors below

Now when the bricks had fallen from the barrel to the floor
Sure I outweighed the barrel and I started down once more
Still clinging tightly to the rope I headed to the ground
I fell among the broken bricks that were all scattered 'round

As I lay there moaning on the floor, I thought I'd passed the worst
And the barrel struck the pulley wheel and didn't the bottom burst
A shower of bricks came down on me, surely I hadn't a hope
And as I was losing consciousness, I let go the bloody rope

Now the barrel it being heavier, it started down once more
And it landed right across me as I lay there on the floor
I broke three ribs and my left arm and I can only say
That I hope you'll understand why Paddy's not at work today